The real art of conversation is not only to say the right thing at the right place but to leave unsaid the wrong thing at the tempting moment" Nevill

Just because you think it, does not mean it has a right to be spoken.

So many times I believe we become so self conceited, so full of ourselves, that we like to believe our opinions are worth gold. I catch myself buying into this all the time, for at times I will be having a conversation, but catch myself spending way too much time thinking of how to get this person to hear what I have to say. And if I don't believe they understood it the first time, I will find a new way to say the same thing. Sometimes, its not until they snap, do I realize I am being obnoxious (Hopefully I'm not the only one who can relate to this...)

The truth is, sometimes, if not all the time, it is best to just listen. Shut up, turn off your self conceited, attention wanna-be self, and give the other person a chunk of your time.

And as passive as listening sounds, it really isn't. I've tried the "Just listen" without really being careful on how I am listening. It doesn't work. People are smarter then that.

I believe that's all we really want. We want to be heard. We want to be part of something or someone, we want to touch something in life and leave a mark. We don't want to feel yelled over, pushed out, preached at, shoved aside, forgotten, unloved, disenchanted, ignored or worse of all - feel as if no one cares enough to listen.

There is value in everyone, and everyone is valuable. Shame on me for not living in concordance to this.

With that, have an awesome Sunday!

Don't text and drive!

It's the LAW!

oh, and don't drink and drive,

or forget to click it or ticket.

Ya know.

Just your friendly reminder from a concerned citizen to be safe out there!

Because driving is a right, not a privilege!

HAHA, and instead of fixing that typo I decided to leave it. Because it made me laugh. Love!

"By trying to grab fulfillment everywhere, we find it no where"

I love reading.

Though I love it for various reasons.

Sometimes I enjoy reading for the sheer entertainment value, and trust me, if I am into a book, I become so wrapped around the story, characters, development and plot that it's not uncommon to find me blurry eyed in bed 3:00 AM reading. furiously.

(It is because of this, last semester, I banned myself from such reading during school. Staying up late reading The Kite Runner when you have a test the next morning.... was not the best. Kind of like taking a laxative the night before a Spanish Exam. I'll let your imagination fill in the rest of that story)

And then there is the informational books. Like when I started to run a lot, I bought a book named Brain Training for Runners. I read that. Or the Cycling for Women book... I even have a book titled "7 Things He'll Never Tell you...." fascinating in it's own right. (Yes, I just confessed to doing research on men. Granted some may say that's backwards, but I consider it.... trying to be... knowledgeable...)

And lets not leave out the articles I read sometimes for school that get me talking about ideas and the injustices that exist in this world for months. I cried after reading "Deculturalization and the Struggle for Equality", because for the first time I realized the evils the government did by using education to discriminate and almost de-human the Native Americans, and various other minorities we are all to familiar of.

Why am I ranting about this? I actually have no clue. But it's fun?

Right now I am actually reading Passion & Purity by Elisabeth Elliot for the second time. I love this woman. And I do enjoy this book, so maybe that is why I am writing about my book reading rant. the quote that I titled this entry is actually from this book.

She was talking about the differences, and danger in this cultures views of dating. She wrote, "Everybody's equal. Everybody's free. Nobody is hung up anymore or needs to deny himself anything. In fact, nobody ought to deny himself anything he wants badly - it's dangerous. It's unhealthy. It's sick. If it feels good and you don't do it, you're paranoid. If it doesn't feel good and you do it, you're a masochist" - Elliot.

I'm actually going to just let that sit there. I realize I am not backing up my quote very well, and my point is not very clear. But oh bother.

Because I am little giddy today.

It has just been soooo long since I have felt quite so happy as I have today. I realize that life won't always be this happy... but it is a good day. I'm a lucky girl. It took me long enough to realize it, I know. I know.

"Because noooo... you had to go on a world tour!"

God Bless!

"I have always found that mercy bears richer fruits than strict justice." Abraham Lincoln

Well! I am back in the states. I have been for almost a week now. It feels good to be home, in many ways.

I have postponed writing about Mexico for a reason.... I am confused as to what to write about. What should I really say? Should I talk about the kids, and what we did? Do I talk about how I felt, and the struggles I faced? Or ride the wave of any new current rant I may have?

Thus, my conclusion! I shall do it all! With pictures!

So, as the picture above shows, there are quite a bit of kids in this orphanage.

They all range from the ages 6-12, and about half of the kids there I recognized from two years ago. I helped with the daily life of these children, braided little girls hair for school, made sure they cleaned up after dinner, supervise outside, you know. Daily life. For three weeks.

On the weekends however, I spent time with my awesome friend Yubi. Her family would take me in s

o graciously, and I had an awesome time laughing and relaxing with her and her family. I am so grateful for their love, generosity, and ability to laugh at the crazy American.

But! it wasn't always... easy. My spanish is, and was, horrible. Yubi spoke fluent English with me, so eventually my exhaustion from trying to understand everyone, and trying to make myself understood, gave through. haha, the picture above is me on the day I was sick from some nasty cold that dislocated my head from reality, while trying to find Bible stories to go with devotional lessons. I blame my sickness, but after the 10th time of me voting for Ruth for every lesson, and getting yelled at for it, did I resign to... well... breathing. (always good to do)

It was truly a blessing to go on this trip, and I am truly blessed for going. But it is not what you may think, and I realize everything I say in this nutshell version may paint this picture of "Good Danielle, being all missionary like to all these orphans". Trust me, I understand the brownie points I win by doing this.

But lets cut the crap, and be honest. If I were to be a "great missionary" then on this trip according to the true standards, I was a really bad one. I was spiritually, and

emotionally, rather messy. (Just ask Yubi, she can testify)

I was constantly battling with myself on this trip, and constantly angry with the fact that I was having that battle. Here I am, traveling to Mexico to help, and I was/am in to deep in my own muck to do a good job. I had a very long list of things I could have done better, ways I wish I was different. I just wasn't getting it. I kept asking, "Why am I here God? This isn't making sense to me"

Thank God for His master plan, Thank God for his grace and mercy, patience, and wisdom.

I left for that trip, prepared and ready to rescue the abused and forgotten.

I returned from the trip, rescued, by the abused and forgotten.

All the nights I cried because I felt like I wasn't home...

...God revealed to me that I am home, this is my family. The no matter where I go, I am home with Him.

I realized that when I look into the faces of these foreign people, I am actually looking into a mirror.

And I realized, that in order to live a life that flowed with God's love, mercy and compassion, I have to acknowledge the grace and mercy I desperately need, and receive, in my own life.

With all this said, I am basically saying: Life is not what you think. Life is broken, everywhere I look I see brokenness. Half the time I feel broken, and if I don't, well, I am probably deceived.

Just, never give up uncovering the truth. Don't be too scared to feel the pain, and too prideful to hide it from God. Take your dreams, your passions, and your fears, loneliness, pain, whichever it is, and surrender it all.

For only then, I have learned, is there freedom.

And I will end this with a crazy picture of my favorite Yubi in the whole wide world! Thank you Yubi for being there, for listening, and showing me God's love. Even though you do take forever grocery shopping, and your probably the most stubborn, sarcastic girl I know, I love ya! and miss you!

So yes. I'm Home.